Semi-Handmade

Crocheted Go to Market Money Belt

I recently came across an interesting and timely article by Lisa Bloom for the Huffington Post. The article is a call for change as it relates to girls, how adults speak to them and thier self-esteem. It is a call for a change in pattern, a large pattern seen in society.

"Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything." - Lisa Bloom

Breaking the habit of connecting based on looks is just about as hard as breaking the habit of saying  "you are so smart" or "good job". (At least it has been for me!)

When I am designing or making for my little ones I often try to focus on function and collaboration, as opposed to mere aesthetics. Sometimes this looks like measuring some books to see how big a book bag needs to be and sometimes it is merely asking a little one to pick out the buttons. Part of this is due to the fact that I have learned that with more collaboration the items I make are more likely to be used and choosen over mass produced products. My hope is that I am teaching my children about the arts (mostly textile arts), teaching them to think independently (not to dress like everyone else) and also that I am building their self-esteem. High hopes right?

That is why I love this project, a crocheted money belt. At 5 1/2 Cassidy seeks opportunities to show autonomy. She is in control and in charge these days, in so many ways. This money belt was just the tool Cassidy needed last week when she was "in charge" of the spending money at the local farmer's market. The belt offered her an opportunity to stretch herself and show her independence, an opportunity to know what it feels like to be prepared and organized.
As with most of the projects that I share in hopes that you will dive in and make something of your own, I highly recommend taking a good look at this schematic and then go for it. Download Schematic for Belt However, if you are the type that wants specifics, I did take notes. Download Farmer Market Crochet Belt

 

Peace ~ Rejoicing in the Big & the Small

 

To Match or Not to Match ~ The Von Trapp Dilemma

"To understand this non-seperation is to rejoice in the happiness of others and share in thier suffering, all the while feeling the joy of our oneness, our connectedness. Our concept of a self, seperate from others, is a delusion, but we can't see our way out of this misconception until we awaken."

                                                 - Sarah Napthali in Buddhism for Mothers

 

 Author and older sister, Lori, and author's mother, Sue. Circa 1976. Matchy robes sewn by Sue.

As opportunites arise this season to 'dress up' a bit I have been pondering about matchy- matchy clothes. Is this a way to become ONE, to become connected? What is it that compels many mothers (myself included) to dress our children in matching clothes? Especially around this time of year. It is darling in photos but what do the kids think of this? Equally clever however are those photographs that really capture the essence of the child, with clothing the child chose for himself (hopefully not matching or coordinated in any way!). Did those of us whom where dressed like our siblings as children come away scarred or more connected? What would Freud say about the subject?

Ok, so maybe I can run/sprint away with things and over analyze a bit (ok, a lot!)

 Easter matchy-matchy dresses for author and older sister, Lori. Circa 1978.

Do you remember dressing like your siblings or even like your parent(s) for special occasions? As a child did you have choices about your wardrobe? Did you dress your children alike over this holiday season or come out looking like the Von Trapp family with a whole family matchy-matchy ensemble?

I was tempted to do the latter with a set of matching pajamas for the entire family made out of an old terrycloth bedspread... but I ended up with just coordinated flannel robes and matching terrycloth pajama pants for Cassidy and CJ. The same vintage pattern was used for both robes but on CJ's I added a hood and a belt as opposed to the button up front with eyelet detail yoke that is on Cassidy's.

 
Author's first attempt at matchy-matchy holiday pajamas with her own children. December 2007.

 
Authors second attempt at matchy-matchy holiday attire. December 2008.

 From the The Sound of Music, the Von Trapp Family in clothes made of curtains.

 
Not 100% matchy-matchy - but coordinating robes for CJ and Cassidy for Holiday season 2010.

 
 Vintage pattern used for Cassidy's and CJ's coordinating robes. Yes,the price was $1.

 
Originally $.39 marked down to $.37, vintage buttons used on Cassidy's holiday 2010 robe.

 

Allow me to introduce you... Ms. A & Ms. B

 
Over the last five years, I have done more soul searching and self discovery than any of the 34 years previous. Motherhood does that to you, forces a little self reflection. Over the past five years, I have come to realize that I have two personalities residing within my one body.

Allow me to introduce you to them both...

Ms. A over analyzes, over thinks and over schedules.

Ms. B lets things unfold as they come.

Ms. A is aware of where things are manufactured, how they are made, what plastic was used, side effects are researched.

Ms. B has the same general awareness of Ms. A but can't manage everything at one time and is okay with letting some things slide and hope for the best.

Ms. A lives tomorrow today.

Ms. B lives in the moment.

Ms. A reads a lot about parenting unconditionally, attends support groups and is a change agent in her community for policy surrounding constructive education. She stays up late at night tormenting herself for ruptures made during the day, mostly around setting limits with her children.

Ms. B parents and loves unconditionally but can very easily fall in and out of old habits and 'ways'- but is always eager to repair and start fresh.

Ms. A is gluten free - 100%.

Ms. B tries to substitute in quinoa or millet, but whole wheat is ok and the occasional bagel slips in.

Ms. A joined the local CSA and volunteers there, cooking every darn root vegetable that comes in that unpredictable box.

Ms. B does what she can to eat local, organic and "whole". Yet, she is known to stop by Vons on the way home to pick up a last minute pound of hormone filled ground beef.

Ms. A gives up head space, effort , time and sometimes extra money to support local artisans and businesses. She also makes a lot of things that the family needs by hand or 'semi-handmade'.

Ms. B has an awareness of shopping local but will stop at Target once a week and can not give up paper plates despite attempts.

Ms. A attaches to outcome throughout any process.

Ms. B can unattach.

 

With adequate protein, a cupful (but not more) of caffeine daily, a regular dosage of Vitamin D and 8 hours of sleep each night, the two peronsalities within my one body can co-habitat gracefully.

Once in a while domestic peace within this one body is disturbed though, one personality does a "power over" move. This happened yesterday.

Last Fall I enjoyed making a few new Fall decorations, nothing glittery or over the top - just some fall color for the house. A knitted "thing" to lay over the side table (below) and a fabric garland to go across the family room. (pictured above)

 

This year Cassidy (4 yo) insists we do not have enough Halloween decorations and reminds me on a daily basis that we need to get this done.

A good combination fo the two personalities would have discussed calmly with Cassidy over-consumption, how many decorations are made in foreign countries and in what conditions. A good combination of me would have pulled out the felt, low temp glue gun, glitter, rope and set up a child friendly decoration making station. Maybe a little internet research would have been done to find child friendly craft ideas that could be used as decoartions.

This odd,  wrong combination, of my two personalities rose to the occasion and arrived unwelcome to the situation. This person really did not want to mess up her just cleaned house nor spend energy on such dialogue. She loaded up two kids to go to JoAnn's, with 50% off coupon in the pocket. She came home with way too many lawn stakes, all of which had a gold "Made in China" stickers. So proud to have the task completed quickly and easily, without even messing up the clean floor- she was so pleased and paraded around her house (the one with the clean floor) for about 30 minutes.

Now every time I pass through the front door these lawn stakes glare at me. It is not so much that they were made in China that gets me the most, but that I passed on an opportunity to set an example. I allowed a need that we (Cassidy ) had to not transform into an outlet for learning and creativity. These lawn stakes, they are a constant reminder of how easy it is to go off my balance. A terrific reminder for me as the holiday season approaches - this season may take a little more protein and a little more Vitamin D than prior years. 
 

Our King of Everything

 
So I was perusing thru Etsy (you know in my spare time), specifically in a favorite storefront - Creative Thursday. I ran into this adorable, so succinct and so thoughtfully illustrated King of Everything print. I am sure I had seen this print in her shop before, but it spoke to me on this particular day. The Los Angeles based artist has a blog, here.

 
It reminded me of the terrific (opinion) crowns I made the kiddos, an idea inspired from Amanda Blake Soule's book Creative Family.

The project is very simple and easy to modify to fit your own little ones interests.

Then I got to thinking, "You know Cassidy's crown is hanging on her dress up mirror, where is CJ's?  I never made CJ's!" Off to the studio I went, and there (after I decent amount of digging) was a bag of the supplies all ready to go. Why I never finished - well I am sure you know why.

I dove right in, and CJ was thrilled. He never said anything about not having one for himself, one like his sisters. But the look on his sweet little face when the last stitch was made tells me he was ready to be crowned.

This (and a bit of arguing and competing around here) all make me think quite a bit about siblings and what some call "rivalry", which in and of itself denotes friction - thus I try to avoid the terminology.  I don't know how to put into words the feelings and thoughts I have on siblings, I have a lot more questions than answers here. I just know from the look on his face, he was ready to be crowned "Our King of Everything" even if just for one afternoon.

 

20 Lessons Learned from a Semi-Handmade Summer

Hello friends. As we settle into Fall schedules I have been running every which way to get us all settled. Thus my absence from this space. I have had a bit of time to ponder (while driving-it's the best time to ponder these days) though on what was our first non-corporate mommy, semi-handmade, summer.

A lot was learned. Here are the highlights.

1. A laid back summer takes some planning.

2. A laid back summer takes a willingness to detach from plans.

 
 3. A good clean bay anywhere, stocked cooler of yummy snacks and a stand up paddle board is a lot more fun than any amusement park.

4. A backyard pool and a few cousins to play with, is a lot more memorable than any amusement park.

 
 5. Some warm sand, a good shovel or sifter and a fresh seaside breeze is a lot more relaxing than any amusement park.

 
6. A tour of a (fairly) local farm is a lot more entertaining than an amusement park.

7. I am not an amusement park person.

8. Ask grandparents or aunties to take the kids overnight every so often - the kids are eager to show the independence, others eager to host and you get time to do, time to make, time to have long thoughts.

9. Don't count on turquoise skies all summer, even seaside in Southern California.

 
 10. The love of all things "country club" is incredibly hereditary. Above, Cassidy loving poolside service. (also the Hipstamatic is contagious, it was used to take this country club photo)

11. When that point comes that you veer from learning to be just merely water safe to actually swimming - be ready to stock the frig. Boy, Oh Boy -  can they eat after a day in the pool.

12. I love being a Part-Time Hybrid Mom, M-phD and all.

 
 13. Having the perfect (perfect for you, anyhow) calendar system is critical. For me that is Erin Condren's Life Planner. The cover photo is something I can enjoy all year (pic by Katie Davies) and the organization she has set up inside just works for me. No excuses now!

14. Skateboarding is not a crime.

15. The season (and availability) of Fresh Wild Caught salmon is almost as exciting as the season of fresh tomatoes and peaches.

16. Learning the Ukulele is a lot harder than it may seem.

17. Little girls love purple and handmade dresses, see the tutorial for a simple one here.

 
18. When you take your camera off auto - magical things can happen.

19. Just a little exposure to media and commercials and you have yourself a 4 year old high fashion model whom thinks she is Hannah Montana. The TV needs to stay off, shame on me for letting up a little on this.

20. It is never too early to think about Halloween costumes.

 

Hope you are enjoying the last light of summer before the time changes! 

The Truth Is...

The truth is... life is gray and I am thrilled about this. This is my truth.

Nothing is fitting into a box for me as I thought it would at this stage, few things are black and white, everything is up for realizing. Most things have two sides to it. So many conflicting emotions, thoughts, realities.

At one time this was overwhelming, for the moment it is refreshing. This is my truth.

I aim to simplify, I have 26 pairs of jeans.

Ukulele lessons intended for the purpose of modeling determination and what practice can do,  both excruciating and exciting at the same time.

I am working toward un-attachment, yet never been more attached than at this moment.

I left the corporate world to devote myself more fully to my family, this has led to freedom and suffocation simultaneously.

The truth is... that life is gray and I am thrilled about this. This is my truth.

Gratitude on a daily basis overwhelms me, yet I yearn for so much more.

Equanimity is the goal, yet impatience and un-acceptance remain.

Non-Violent Communication is practiced with our children but I speak violently to myself.

With diminishing returns parenting can make one "un-happy" and we certainly have our hands full over here, yet my body aches to carry another and I can't give up the boxes of outgrown onesies. Nursing bras aren't even put away yet.

I am truly interested in music, design, art, politics and culture but it seems that I can only talk about one subject - my own children.

Aware of a need to stop and realize, stop and breathe, stop and live with intention - yet only two days in August are empty squares on the calendar and we have four activities today alone.

The truth is... that life is gray and I am thrilled about this. This is my truth.

 

ABCs of a Semi-Handmade Summer

Since 1986 I have had a job each summer that involved a time clock or a corporate responsibility to perform. Now in a part-time hybrid situation, it is an entirely different sort of summer, with entirely different stresses. I don't get coffee breaks, a chance to check email, a lunch hour and the travel perks are long gone. Yet, so far this summer there has been a lot more gratitude than any summer in the past and moments of pure freedom that overwhelmed us all with joy.

Here are the ABCs of our family's summer with a mother that is not tied to a corporate mission statement but rather a different mission of sorts.

A.  Awareness and reflection.

B. Blue basketball shorts worn day & nite, and momma getting over not being everyone's stylist.

C. Confidence to give monkey bars a try, and gratitude for being a spectator for such feats.

D. Dribbling, throwing, kicking, skating all the time.

E. Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Rebecca Bailey, rereading it again and having a few aha moment.

F. Flackers, flax crackers. And trying to give up all gluten.

G. Giving up the 9pm-Midnight sewing, reading, relaxing hours and succumbing to the fact that we all need 8-9 hours of sleep.

H. Hordes of fruit and tomatoes from our CSA, and donating most of our own garden to birds and other healthy nocturnal creatures.

I. Iyengar Yoga 2x per week + cardio core 2x per week = happy mommy = happy family. Trying to fit that in every week is the challenge.

J. Just restraining when it comes to speaking, restraint is an overlooked virtue. Ask, "Why am I saying this?" (from Buddhism for Mothersby Sarah Napthali)

K. Keeping in touch with school friends and making new ones.

L. Learning how to do an Ollie on the skateboard, at age 2 & 38.

M. Mastering the under 500 calorie veggie burger for myself, with notes here. Download The under 500.

N. New (only new to me) music discovered, like Marc B. New artists discovered that have almost my exact name, the other Kathi Crosby.

O. One pot dinners, good cold or warm, and taking them down to the beach for picnics without a fuss. Such picnics lead to 'together' moments like this above and skies like this below. Also, no dishes in the kitchen. Win-win.

P. Parks, newly discovered, that have castle play structures and offer up a little bit of knitting time for mom and role playing for kiddos.

Q. Quests such a learning the Ukulele or taking a Krav Magna (martial art) course, to model to our children how to stretch ourselves and "practice" - and go where it feels a little uncomfortable.

R. Ravelry, and slowly getting 10+ years of projects recorded.

S. Swinging very, very high.

T. Tears swelling up as I watch a 4 year old swim across a swimming pool for the 1st time and how she comes up from the water beaming with pride.

U. Uninhibited use of letters.

V. Violently falling in love with an iphone.

W. Welcoming friends over for dinner.

XYZ. Watching it click in the brain of a 4 year old that XYZ is indeed three letters contrary to how it sounds in the ABC song.

Unfolding ~ Genes or Environment?

I have been pondering a bit about gender - and sports - nature versus nurture- genes and environment. I just don't get it -in the same household one kiddo can be so enthralled with sports of all kinds and another kiddo limits her "fair weather" interest to any sport that does not require shoes. CJ is eating and dreaming sports right now. His determination and focus is thrilling. You may remember, as I had mentioned before how he is especially interested in skateboarding. Nobody in our family skateboards. I can't explain the magnetic draw he has to the sport- other than we do see a lot of skateboarders along the ocean boardwalk and at a local skate park we pass by every time we drive to/from our house.

Every time we pass the skateboard park, I say "next time". "Someday we will stop and watch. Someday when we are not in a hurry. Someday when we do not need to get to XYZ on time" I don't want to be a someday mom, or person for that matter. I don't want to set an example that we can do things, someday. When is someday, anyhow? Last week we stopped twice to watch the skaters, and CJ was in awe. He has been practicing on his Yo Baby practice board when not on an actual board. When away from a board, he has a tiny little skateboard gripped in his tiny 2 year old still a little chubby hand.

Watching this nature versus nurture "thing" unfold right in front of my eyes - it is really a hoot!

 
 

Playing in the sand above, but a tech deck skateboard in his grip.

This video was taken on Easter Sunday 2010. It may have been the last day the little guy let me dress him. Since this day he has worn basketball shorts or board shorts day and night, as he insists. Glad now that I choose those seersucker pants for the final day that I was allowed to "style" him out.

Corners (Part Three) ~ Peace by the Rocker

I am still working on some corners, and there are still some corners to tend to. I recently finished and hung a peace banner above our beloved Dutailier rocker. This comfy rocker has held us during a lot of peaceful and quiet moments. The rocker holds some memories that I often forget about now, like how tired I was in those first months of motherhood and how I once fretted over sleep schedules. CJ still lets me rock him to sleep each night, lately though he seems a little annoyed with the fact that he is getting a bit too big to find that comfort zone in my lap that once came so naturally.

I did the peace banner in my favorite colors, an array of avocado greens from my stash. The banner idea came from Soulemama's Handmade Home.  The blanket on the rocker was my first attempt at knitting cables. I like sitting on it, it reminds me what comes along with patience. So this is our Peace by the Rocker...